MenoSunday; Life Lived Lovingly

The visit to the CMoI  left its mark. One's own experience had to be acknowledged.

Leaving the country of one's birth to start over was not a decision made lightly. It was made for worthy reasons; the need to depart a Thatcherite Britain, the greater opportunity for gainful employment versus the lower cost of living Down Under; but also a deep inner call, an overriding sense that this move would be absolutely the best for me in the long-term. It has proven to be so.

What is important about this, though, is that the decision was all mine. It was freely made. As depressed as one felt in the Britain of the 80s, it was still a free and relatively safe country, despite Irish terrorism and militant unionism and wars with Argentinians. There was an opportunity, however and the luxury of freedom of choice. There was something better on offer, though not without effort and heartache of its own.

The reason for all migration, from the beginning of social time, has been for improving one's chances in the game of life. Sometimes that is from free choice. Oftentimes it is not. History is riddled with examples of diasporas caused by  natural disasters or by wars and invasions. Empires have risen and fallen. Parthians, Romans, Mughals, Mongols, the Chinese Dynasties... later, the Vikings, the Angles and Saxons, the Normans... who all mingled and dominated the natives of each land they 'migrated' to, absorbing them. Or obliterating them. Then along came the British Empire. Much to admire, much to despise. Every century has examples of a dominant power in the world. Whether that dominance is seen as aggressive or benign very much depends where one is living in it.

So it goes on. People shift or get shunted around the globe, by choice, or not. Those who are in a place and find 'the other' entering their space start to go into defend mode. We have, as a species, such a sense of possession, and possession builds selfishness. It also builds greed.

It is this selfishness and greed which currently has various nations of the world seeking to close the windows of opportunity, the doors of welcome, the piers and runways of refuge. "Heaven forbid we should have done unto us what we have done to others."  It is also fear. The fear of having to alter ourselves to some degree in order to meet 'the other'. Fear of 'losing out' (jobs/housing/finance...) "Beware the Boogie-man, honey, 'case he does the nasty."

Thankfully, within each of those nations there are also those who refuse to be shut behind locked doors or 'walls'. They chose to live life Lovingly and acknowledge that basically, the human critter is a fine thing and only wishes the best for itself, with minimal aggravation. Folk who open their arms, provide support, and give the smile of assurance that all will be well, in time.

I was of the same appearance, spoke a common language (almost) and had desirable work skills when I landed in OZ. Despite the certificate of citizenship, it still took some five or six years for me to feel I was accepted fully as Aussie and not get asked 'wherya-visitn-from?' I became a local and it was grand, grand feeling. To be accepted is an enormous emotional necessity. Every human being desires acceptance. A few seek to impose it; most merely seek it. Those with the capital 'ell' Love as their basic value in life cannot do anything other than provide that acceptance. This does not mean it is easy to give; but it is an imperative if one is to be true to the value of CeL.




13 comments:

  1. I think this is an excellence reminder in a world that is closing their doors to so many who have been forced out against their will, because a few bad apples have poisoned the whole barrel.

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  2. YaYa thank you for this background information on your move to Oz...
    Your ability to adapt to where ever you are at the time is a gift...every place you go fits you to a T and you leave those you met with such a lifetime of good memories. We know we were among the lucky!!
    Lots of hugs
    HiC and Bcat

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  3. My biological great great (insert more great's here) grandfather was one of the original settlers in the US. My adopted family, only immigrated from two generations ago, from England, Norway and Sweden respectively. Give my line of work, I'm aware of terror and it's dangers and we can't turn a blind eye to it, but we need to work harder to ensure families and those in need who only wish to come here to make a good life are welcome.

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    1. Hari OM
      Indeed. This was not to say we must drop all sensible guards; but definitely a plea for greater understanding of the fact that migration happens and all the 'great walls' eventually crumble. Yxx

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  4. Hello, It is just a nice feeling to be accepted and feel safe wherever we go or live. Enjoy your Sunday and the new week ahead!

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  5. good day, YAM
    Love this post so much. I have only migrated between a couple of states in the US myself. People in Missouri noticed my accent, southern/Texan, sounding different. And some customs were different. Moving back to Texas after 38 years was almost as difficult. Had to have my marriage license or passport to get my drivers license as my name did not match my birth certificate. My Missouri drivers license with my photo and my birth certificate were insufficient for my home state. I was grumpy. janice xx

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    1. Hari OM
      Yes, well, the return to the land of my birth a couple of years back was fraught with similar 'reverse cultural' stuff, so I can identify with your frustration! Yxx

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  6. Two decades, two very different 'migrations'. In Oklahoma l learned to be a bit wary of folk who considered it a mark of status to have a friend with an English accent. That has been less of an issue in Scotland! But in both places I have been blessed with meeting wonderful people and have developed deep, genuine and enduring friendships. Very different of course for many of the world's refugees and economic migrants. (Who, by the way, ever spoke in derogatory terms of a British citizen seeking their fortunes abroad, as an 'economic migrant'. According to much of our press in the UK , this is somehow our birthright, but does not apply to citizens of other counties, especially if they have black or brown skin or, increasingly, an East European accent….)
    Cheers, Gail.

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  7. One of the good things about being a dog is that we never discriminate against dogs from other countries. People should be more like dogs.
    From Vancouver
    Louis Dog Armstrong

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  8. Having lived in several countries as well, I have found that being accepted is one of the most difficult things. Even if your skin colour is right and your language is right and your culture is (nearly) right. Although sometimes it's more in my head than in anybody else's! I think I am accepted where I live now. Because I tried to integrate, because I didn't revert to speaking English but stuck to Norwegian, because I do join in with several of the important Norwegian customs. But at the same time I will always remain an outsider, partly because of my age, partly because of who I am. It doesn't bother me that much. Perhaps in the future it will bother me more.

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  9. I simply don't have the courage to travel. My trials and tribulations with my first husband, I expect, then my inability to manage my parent's dying. I am happy to cocoon here, though!

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