Menospection; Delving Deep

I recently copied down all the Mac History posts into OneNote... there's a vague intention to tidy them up and make them into a flowing wholeness. A couple of folk have dropped hints this year that the actual 'menomoirs' seemed to have drawn to a halt. True. A couple of reasons for this; firstly, is anyone really that interested in a nobody's history?.. secondly, can I get over the sense of it being indulgent and, possibly, rather vain? It was found these queries answered themselves, as I do enjoy reading all my pals' moments of introspection and self-expression, and nobody is a nobody to everybody, everyone is a somebody to someone...

It was interesting going back to very early posts... there was a heavy dose of self-consciousness present, no doubt about it!

Then again, am quietly pleased that, however uneven, the blog has been consistent insofar as 'voice' and integrity. What you see is what you get, here at the YAMster's page and, because this one of the four blogs has no particular focus, you get a fair impression of how scattered she can be!!! It's fairly well-contained though. A controlled explosion, as it were. One of the things I love about writing of any kind is that once the pen hits the paper (print hits the screen), it's as much of a revelation to me as to you what appears...

...and very often one ends up at a destination one never knew existed. As it says up there on the left, "that's the adventure, is it not?"

A major part of 'keeping it together' for me in this year, which has not at all gone the way one might have hoped or designed, is the discipline of maintaining morning prayers (the meditation has gone a bit AWOL, but I know it will return) and the evening practice of lighting the lamp at the altar. Small but important things.

It struck me how stablising it is to have 'ritual' in the every day. What's that? You think you don't have ritual? What about the morning ablutions? That first cuppa of the day? Everyone has those... then there are the personal, individual things. For some, it is essential to get their fifteen minutes with the newspaper, or the walk with the dog; for others, it can be the regularity of meals, with set times... there are endless varieties to what each have as their regular habits, which frame the day and hold it in place. For some of us that is offering up a welcome to the day, a giving of thanks. In the Hindu tradition, there is a prayer/mantra for just about every act and moment in life.

The reason for this is to take the focus away from the small ego and place emphasis on the all-round, all-pervasive quality of Nature and Living. It places the individual in perspective against the wider existence. The essence is 'thought before action'. Take one of the morning shlokas, for example;

समुद्रवसने देवि पर्वतस्तनमण्डले | विष्णुपत्नि नमस्तुभ्यं पादस्पर्शं क्षमस्व मे || 

          samudra-vasane devi parvata-stana-mandale,
          vishnupatni namastubhyam paadasparsham kshamasva me.

          Oh Mother Earth (The Devi) who is having ocean as Her garments and mountains as                     Her bosom, 
         Who is the consort of Sri Vishnu, we bow to You; please forgive our touching you with                 our feet. 

This is chanted prior to rising from the bed and is intended to make us aware that every move we make upon the earth has an effect upon it. For those who are into the 'mindfulness' movement (Western, monetized, adaptation of Sanskrit, free for all, philosophy... but that's another soapbox...), this will make some sense. To have a chant to be uttered before embarking on a journey, or eating, or joining in a meeting... all help to focus the mind, make it alert to the impending action/event and maximising the capacity to perform and the benefit gained.

Each to their own. Will end it here. See? Who knew we'd share a prayer today?