…..'A sense of humour lends you poise, it gives you balance and it helps you to bend without breaking'…..

(HH Pujya Gurudev Swami Chinmayananda)

Menarchupial [men-are-ku-hoopy-ul]; the condition of unexplained girth.

One of the symptoms that one has had to fight from the very early, not-yet-named-so-I-can't-be-in-it, stages of menosoup is the expanding girth.  You've heard about it, read about it, seen it all around.

Of course, this is the epidemic age of very early onset menosoup if this symptom alone were the aid to diagnosis.  We are a global family of expanded girthness.  However, I am not talking about the obesity crisis that almost the entire population of the planet is faced with.  This is the "but I'm a vegetarian, two meals a day and never in the dark" type of mystery growth that comes upon one almost overnight.  Almost exactly after the 40th birthday to be precise. Looking at a plate of beancurd and noodles puts on half a kilo straight away.  Heaven alone knows what actually eating it does.

Well I know but I'm not letting on.

Then something peculiar occurs.  One who has never had a sweet tooth discovers it was lying quietly at the back there, somewhere under the 110th row back, 5th row in from the right, taste bud.  Further, as the weight is going on and won't come off no matter how much Bollywood Bhangra one cracks on with, then why worry?  If you want that hot choco go for it.  Iced choco?  Why not.  Cuppa and … a biccy?  I never ate biscuits.

Different story now.

Peri-menopause is the medical period of time from the very first symptom of menosoup to the very last symptom.  One can only know it in retrospect.  Retrospectively I can report that I began to look like a marsupial at around age 41. Koalas are marsupials. 

Yes I became a round ball of hugginess, ie menorchupial, within eleven months of cresting that hill.  I have assessed pictures of my maternal grandmother as I am given to understand one can garner clues as to one's future through such research.

It's all her fault.

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