…..'A sense of humour lends you poise, it gives you balance and it helps you to bend without breaking'…..

(HH Pujya Gurudev Swami Chinmayananda)

MenoSunday; Life Lived Lovingly

What is Love and how do we express it? Capital 'ell' is used here to differentiate between pure and string-free Love and that which so many think to be love.

With Love one becomes free and with love one becomes bound.

It is vitally important to understand and adopt this difference in one's life, if the ravages of agonies and ecstasies which lesser love brings are to be avoided. Higher Love can also have its peaks and troughs, but they are of a much gentler swell and permit the 'sailor' on the sea of life the chance to take appropriate action to avoid being tossed about or drowned.

Marketing for love is very easy and most 'sailors' are easy prey. Marketing for Love is challenging, for it demands of the 'sailor' that s/he make efforts for the prize. It is not something which can be put into a product and a commercial value placed upon it.

So many willingly expend their energy 'looking for love'. Unless we are feeling our hormones or our emotions, we don't think love is there. This leaves scope for love to be used as a weapon, to be misused or become abusive. The attachment bond formed from birth is an animal condition designed to preserve life and ensure perpetuation of the species. In the human critter, the bonds linger, or even get strengthened by misuse and abuse of the concept. What is being craved is affection; but affection, by its very nature, can be nothing more than a passing moment. Thus we set up situations where we are constantly in need of it. This is why it can be said that love is a drug. Affection, intimacy, emotional displays - all have their place; but when we think that life is nothing with out these things, when we think that without them we are without love, we are surrendering our common sense and losing the opportunity to go in search of True Love.

True Love is not a knight in shining armour, the relationship between a rescuer or the rescued.  It is not idealisation, admiration, praise, desire, romance, infatuation, physical or emotional care. Nor is it appreciation, shared interests, intellectual engagement, sex, pleasure, attachment, affection, enmeshment, financial or moral support... 

All of these things can be positive, on many different levels and are all aspects of expression of love.

However, we can have any or all of these things in our life and still have a sense of emptiness. We can still feel a lack. All those things, even in their most positive output, are external to us and result in bonds/dependencies being formed which can result, eventually, in feelings of suffocation, entrapment, lack of sufficient quantities of any or all elements. All of these things can end. They can be withdrawn from us and due to the bonds, we feel pain at their loss. These things can lead to a building of 'competition'; unwittingly we fall into the trap of attack and defence, seeking to elevate our position and grab a firmer hold.

What constitutes Love is an emanation from the core of the being. It requires no expression, yet its presence is simply felt. It can be present within the elements we might list as a requirement of love, but it does not need those elements to be present. For those fortunate enough to have been in the presence of such Love, the release and relief felt are beyond description. Tears we did not know we had may flow. The heart we thought could not feel more is filled to a fullness such that the whole body is full.

Once it is discovered it is never lost. There is no end to Love once we are secure within it. There is no competition, no sense of lack. It encompasses all regardless of whether they have something to offer in return. Love is not needy or greedy. Love requires nothing of the physical yet knows how to wrap with a warmth to match the sun. Love never questions and cannot be questioned.

Love is not something to be hunted, packaged, quantified, negotiated. Love simply IS and it sits awaiting your discovery.


  1. Ooohh. That is a deep one! I have a tendency not to like being in groups.

  2. All to much I'm happy with friendship these days.

  3. As a society we have done our best to confuse the issue. I blame advertising for much of it but then we took the ball and ran with it. That quote is spot on for I know I have many barriers within myself.


  4. Such beautiful words. I'm thankful every day for the love I hold from family and friends, on and off blog, and the furry ones that lean into me for love.

  5. I hope love is everywhere and love is strong enough to chase all bad shadows away...

  6. Hello, Great post and I love the Rumi quote. I am thankful for the love of my family and friends. Enjoy your day and the new week ahead!

  7. Love is greeting family as they enter your home!


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